The voicemail, as best as I can transcribe it:
Hey, Jeremy, this is Ron. I was calling because I saw the news on your blog today that you are now a proud father and Katie is now a proud mother. So, congratulations guys! It's really fantastic. I can imagine that it must be very heady times. Give me a call when you get a chance. I can imagine that you must be pretty busy getting used to a pretty big change in life and lifestyle. I hope all is well. I'll talk to you soon. Bye.
As a rule, I do not discuss matters from my intimate life on this blog. However, for reasons unclear to me, some matters of clarification appear to be in order:
1. I am not married.
2. I have never fathered a child.
3. I have never, as best I can recall, been romantically involved with anyone answering to the name of "Katie."
4. I do not have anyone named "Ron" listed in my phone address book; I am drawing a complete blank on who might be a "Ron" and who would expect me to recognize him from "This is Ron" and have my cell phone number; I do not recognize the voice on my voicemail; my cell phone was off for large parts of yesterday and so I don't have any caller ID for the call.
None of which is to suggest that I don't appreciate the warm sentiments, Ron. I do fear that you might have somehow drawn some incorrect inferences, and that your well wishes might be a bit misdirected. I'm sorry I don't recognize you from your name or voice.
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